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Cotton thrives in Line of Duty

SCC-1857 interview of Opening Batsman Kenny Cotton in the presence of Fundraising and Operations Officer Christopher Sharp

For the DIR, the screen shows a picture of Don Bradman, currently considered the best test bastman of all time. Our first consideration is item SCC-5, a cable knit cricket jumper with royal blue and gold trim, made from 60% cotton and 40% polyester.

Document 5 in your folders. This cricket jumper yielded item reference KC1. That’s document 6 in your folders. KC-1 is DNA which also matches fibres found on Don Bradman’s Baggy Green.

Can you confirm your whereabouts on Sunday 18th April between the hours of 13:30 and 19:00 hours?

Well it was a nice day, the sun was out so I thought i’d go for a walk in the park.

Item KC1 was recovered at Urmston Cricket Club and was found in your possession during an incredible 102 run pre season friendly victory for the 3rd XI. The match was between Stretford 3rd XI and Didsbury 5th XI but played at Moorside Road.

We have evidence to show that you were impersonating Don Bradman on Sunday. Are you Don Bradman?

The DIR the suspect isn’t responding.

Document 6 in your folders. Document 6 is the Stretford Batting Scorecard showing that the your side scored 219/8 off 40 overs. Waqas Mahmood (32), Pav Aqueel (59*) weighed in with runs but it was actually youself Kenny Cotton, who more than doubled your highest Stretford score by blasting 83 which included 11 fours and one big straight six. Now I put it to you Mr Cotton that you were impersonating the Don on Sunday, it couldn’t be more clear. Mother of God.

Document 7 in your folders. Document 7 are Stretford’s bowling figures. The figures clearly show a ruthless and calculated assault against the Didsbury batting line up. Charlie Sellors (3/10), Jamie Cotton (3/24) Uwais Siddique (2/16) and Waqas Mahmood (2/29) all joined the assault.

Document 8 in your folders. Document 8 shows Didbury’s batting card which shows a solitary 49 by Matt Laker compiled with psuedo enjoyment, as the only notable contribution from the OCG (other cricket group)

I put it you Mr Cotton that yourself, captain Usman Hassan and Director of Cricket Guy Robinson will be pleased with the performace even though this was a friendly

For the DIR the suspect isn’t responding

The interview is terminated

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Double Delight on Opening Weekend

Since the relaxation of social distancing measures in early April, Stretford have been busy preparing for the season. The club has installed Mike Murphy as player/coach, who has joined from Dukinfield. Murphy has excellent coaching credentials and works for Lancashire CCC and also strengthens the batting lineup with a steady head. The club was awarded £33k from Suez Communities Trust to relay the playing square which will be ready for use at the end of April and installed an artifical wicket for community use.

In the meantime a sponsored bike ride last season raised money to invest in new sightscreens and refurbish the heavy roller. The club has also built an outdoor bar and secured funding from Manchester Airport Trust fund to invest in new seating. This will eventually enable the club to be used for functions in the main club house every weekend. Everything is set for the club to launch another assault on the league to secure promotion to the Championship.

On the pitch, the club chalked up an impressive double win this weekend in the opening fixtures of the GMCL Division 1 2021 season.

Ryan Williams took the 1st XI to Chorlton to face old foes South West Manchester in the A6010 derby and notched up a 62 run win in a real humdinger. After wining the toss Stretford posted an intimidating 259/6 off the alloted 50 overs. Every batsmen chipped in with valuable contributions including Harry Whitehead (34) and Tom Coulson (36*) but it was Munir Khan (73*) who was king bee holding the innings together at a run a ball.

In reply South West ticked along at four runs per over, helped by some generous Stretford fielding and wayward bowling. At 140/3 off 30 overs looked to be on course to make it a close match but when Kari’s stumps were left spread eagled by Williams (4/38) Stretford clicked into gear. Tom Coulson dried up the runs rate with 1/38 off 10 and reliable all rounder Benjy Evans (4/52) removed the lower middle order. South West were bowled out for 197. Stretford will reflect on a good performance posting oveer 250 for the first time inn two seasons, still with room for improvement.

The 2nd team played host to Winton but the match was played at Radcliffe due to the groundworks at the Boundary. The field at Radcliffe is enormous and with a slow outfield and slow low pitch run scoring was difficult. Winton chose to bat first but were not in the mood to graft and were soon in trouble at 57-6. Robert Renforth, Alex Bowman and Evan Turner all captured a wicket apeice and Alex Grant 2/23 but a spirited lower order fightback from Danny Seenan (26) Grundy (16) and Moby (16) pushed the score to 117. Adam Saynor 4/21 off 10 overs was the pick of the bowlers and at times proved unplayable each time he dipped into his box of tricks.

Jamie Cotton (24) and Ben Lomax (12) opened with a 30 run partnership to settle the home side’s nerves but both were removed to leave Stretford at 62/2. Craig Turner (52*) dealt with any loose ball fiercely and veteran, Chris Sharp (21*) steered the ship home with a solid 57 run partnership to enable a comfortable 8 wicket win.

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Life Member, John Fish, dies aged 82

It is with great sadness that I have to inform you that Life Member, John Fish, has died over last weekend aged 82
.
John had a long association with SCC and kindly donated many hours of service to the club over the years where his skills as a plumber were invaluable. He was extremely committed to the club and was instrumental in helping it expand after it moved to the Lesley Road site.

I first met John when I was a junior member at the club around 1998 and I must admit that, at first, his razor sharp forthright views and 365 grey suits were quite scary. As time moved on far from being scared I realised John actually possessed a very dry, Yorkshire wit and loved to talk about future plans for the club and who was doing what.

When we last spoke at the Adrian Fish Junior Trios (a memorial intra club junior tournament for his son Adrian) I informed him that the three containers we have for cricket machinery are rusty, full of holes and beyond repair. I advised him that we had been quoted £1500 just for supply of just one container. Immediately John recoiled in true white rose style and said “that’s too expensive, you want to get one off the back of a lorry”. I walked away to leave John guffawing at his own joke.

On behalf of the club I would like to pass on condolences to Pat, Stuart, Heather, Kath and Gareth and the rest of the family.

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Stretford

Exponents, players, from everywhere else
Plume away from Edge Lane Station to Stretford Mall
To play Bradman’s shots and deliver like Wes Hall
Just wait, and let the sight of this vivid field of green
be the place where dreams become real

Maybe, think, why play anywhere else?

Brooding clouds bound azure skies beyond the door
as worms feast upon rusty autumn leaves
The light merely a stranger upon the shore

Rollers glisten with the biting frost, wholly, untamed
Hopes for the season ornament the darkness
While the heroes of tomorrow wait, as yet, unnamed (with pad rash)

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Stretford’s Co-op Season

Sometime ago the club applied to be selected as a “Local Cause” for support from Co-op. We were notified that we’ve been selected ahead of many applications in the area. We would like to thank Co-op for choosing Stretford Cricket Club.

What does this mean? I hear you ask. Well if you are already a Co-op member and do your shopping there, or have indeed used the funeral services then you will already be helping local causes and I would be grateful if you logged on and selected Stretford as your cause.

If you are not a member, it’s almost free to join on the website (a quid). For every £1.00 spent the club will get 2% paid directly to us. It’s a great way to support the club. Our project will focus on the youngsters in the community and at the club to ensure we remove barriers to physical activity, increase social inclusion, encourage the uptake of cricket and the chance to be part of a wider community.

Please spread the word with friends and family.
https://www.coop.co.uk/local-causes

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Ground Improvement work gathering pace

Our ground Improvement plan is now in full swing. We secured 33k from SUEZ Communities Trust to resurface our uneven playing square and install an astroturf wicket.

Thanks to Chris Sharp who spearheaded the funding bid and took a massive amount of work and time between September 2019 and Feb 2020.

It’s an exciting time for the club as we seek to improve our ground for current members, attract new players and the wider community.

We encourage everyone to help us attract new members and players, there is loads of opportunity at Stretford. We also welcome everyone to hire our astroturf wicket for work and social matches through next season and beyond.

The next stage of the improvement plan will see the arrival of a new heavy roller to maintain the square, two new sightscreens at the north end thanks to Rob Renforth and his exhausted band of sponsored cyclists and a new outdoor bar and patio area for everyone to enjoy the cricket and to free up our lounge bar for functions.

Come and ride the SCC wave and let’s aim as high as we possibly can!

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Club Caps for two Stretford Starlets

Two of Stretford’s rising stars were presented their club caps this week following excellent performances in the 2ndXI.

Jamie Cotton (5/31 v Monton)and Evan Turner (5/44 v Whalley Range) both captured five wicket hauls against senior opposition; outstanding bowling figures for two young spinners. Keep up your hard work lads, we are proud of you and our junior section. Transferring performances from junior matches to senior is a great sign for the future.

The club caps for elite performance are in association with the Stroke Association. A donation has been made of £50 to the association for every cap we give out. Three recent Stretford members have been victims of Stroke and our best wishes go to Rana Saqlain of our senior section for a good recovery.

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Positive Covid Test for Opposition: Club Closed Until Monday 24th August

Unfortunately we have been informed this morning that a player from the opposition 3rd XI senior team fixture last Sunday has been tested positive for COVID 19.
Therefore all use of all club facilities are as now closed until Monday 24th August .
This also means that ALL fixtures both Junior and Senior are cancelled at both home and away venues this weekend .
Because of our strict cleaning policy of the toilets and restricted access to the clubhouse we expect there should be no reason for any alarm .
Anyone who played in that fixture is advised to take a test as is anyone who is showing any symptoms.